I've sort of avoided blogging in this journal for the simple lack of anything nice to say about the world u.u - usually when I want to type, the only thing I want to share is how absolutely horribly unhappy my current job is making me.  The bubble of frustraiting inside me has peeked and the place just fuckin sucks T_T I hate the way it makes me feel and how I can never find anything I want to talk about with my friends other than how much I HATE MY JOB. 

It's the only thing I think about, fuck I've even started to dream about all the horrible things that go wrong at work - so even when I'm sleeping I feel like crap.   I spend every waking minute waiting at home for someone to call me and compalin about something I've done (it's happened).  Every day I think about my next shift at work I start to stress over the one little itty bitty thing I may have missed that would make someone yell at me as I walk through the door.  It happens every day I work.   I do things one way to please someone, couple days later people start to complain about it so we stop.  Then they complain that we stopped.  We get told one week to do something one way, then when we do it that way again the next week, we get yelled at for it - we're supposed to do it the way we did it before (MAKE UP YOUR FUCKIN MIND T_T).   This "we" I speak of is only Me and Manda.  Because we take the fall for everyone else.  If I deligate someone to file at the end of the night, and they miss one signature - it's my fault or Manda's fault. 

My manager is the last 'new hire' our store had in my department (long story on how that happened) so she's never had to deal with any influx of new people.  This job takes a while to get use to T.T yet they're expecting 5-6 new people to do everything correct right away.  She has no idea what it's like to be a "new person" who works once or twice a week having to remember everything because she didn't work only "once or twice" a week, she worked 5 days a week and a good friend of hers was the woman in charge.  Of course you're going to catch on fast T.T.  But some of these girls - this is not only their once a week job, it's their first job.  My god people.

And if they don't do things right - it's mine and Manda's responsibility.  I tell them to do this, that or the other thing, and if they do it wrong - it's not their fault - it's mine (like I'm supposed to go over ALL their filing, ALL their safe counting and ALL their cleaning... like I have time to do this T.T).

This job has made me a horrible person in the last 6 weeks... ^^; and I'm going to cut back my availiablitly to like Tues/Thurs/Sat (discount card $_$) or something and work somewhere else T_T hate...

I have nothing else to talk about ._. I feel terrible about it T.T but there's nothing else in my brain except wanting to not work there anymore.  HATE.

I'd outright quit now, but I need money u.u; - to cheer me up I've been spending money on YJ... it's not been working out too well.  I'm still unhappy.